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Have a question? Send it in! Questions are answered by Rabbi Bartfeld.
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# 1580 All Year Round
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Q. I heard from a chasidisher fellow that even if you answer daily to a “gut morgen” greeting in Yidish, a “gut yohr,” as many do, on New Year’s day you should avoid saying it, because of the connotation of the goyishe year. What is Horav Miller’s opinion?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion was recorded on question 695, namely: If someone greets me with a “Happy new year” can I respond likewise?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit”a opinion is that it is permitted since in our days there is no religious connotation to the greeting. In addition, you may initiate the salute if it generates a Kidush Hashem by displaying good manners.
Ohalei Yakov (p. 20) quotes in the name the Apter Rov Zt”l, the meaning of the Posuk (Tehilim 87:6) “Hashem counts in the script of the nations” as conveying that during their New Year we are also granted retroactively a better Rosh Hashono judgment. Since the differences between the individual conduct during the two celebrations, becomes now widely apparent and evident, therefore a Good Year salute to anyone is not out of place. (Nitey Gavriel – Chanuka p.418).
Sefer Chasidim (51) quotes the tradition of one doubling the blessing given, when responding to a greeting. Talmud (Gittin 62a) rules that we do not double a sholom greeting to an Akum and therefore Rav Chisda would greet them first, (as the Ran explains) to avoid doubling the greeting. (See Alei Tomor p. 229, 274)
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a mentioned that this applies today when greeting a Gentile.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a.
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Posted 1/5/2018 12:40 PM |
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# 1579 A Promise Is a Promise
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Q. If I made a shevuah and use Hashem’s name A’’D, but I pronounce it as adinoy. i.e. (The daleth was pronounced with a chiriq). I am obligated to keep the shevuah – is this a shevuah according to the Torah?
A. Any oath and promise has to be kept regardless of having been said with Hashem’s name or not.
Rambam (Sefer Hamitzvos 62), Shulchan Aruch (Y. D. 203),warn us sternly not to swear an oath that has no purpose. This mitzvah is derived from the words of the Aseres Hadibros, “You shall not take the Name of Hashem, your G-d, in vain.” Aruch HaShulchan (H.M. 92: 15) mentions that in our days we abstain from making any oath even in Beis Din.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that one has to be extremely cautions not to incur in the great transgression of expressing a vain or false oath with Hashem’s name, even when not spelled or pronounced properly. Often different communities and traditions differ in their ways of pronunciation, and it likely is counted as His name in other locations. See question 808 and 809 in regards to answering omein and complying one’s obligations with such names.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a.
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Posted 1/5/2018 12:28 PM |
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# 1578 A Cover Story
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Q. Can one get undressed or have marital relations in a room were seforim or English Torah magazine articles are kept in a closed night-table drawer?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that the seforim or magazines that contain proper Torah articles should be covered even when inside a closed drawer.
If the night-table or night-stand are large and the drawer is more than four tefachim by four tefachim (about 40 cm. square), and the unit is also ten tefachim high (80 – 100 cm.) the Rov maintains that the seforim inside do not have to be doubly covered, since they are already in a separate domain. However, most night tables lack that height, therefore the seforim and divrei kedusha inside require an additional cover.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 1/5/2018 12:19 PM |
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# 1577 Lost in the Translation?
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Q. (See question above) Can one get undressed in front of closed printed seforim dealing with Torah topics written in English or other languages?
A. Sefer Chasidim (915) writes that one should be extremely careful in honoring seforim.
Shev Yaakov (55), Massas Binyamin and many others rule that the above applies equally to printed seforim.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it applies also to proper Torah seforim written in other languages.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 1/4/2018 10:09 PM |
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# 1576 In Respect To...
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Q. Is it allowed to get undressed in front of sforim/mezuzos? If the sforim are closed?
A. Mishna Berura (45: 5) rules that one should not stand undressed in front of tefilin or sifrei kodesh. In question 1396 in regards to getting undressed in a bedroom, we wrote: “Shulchan Aruch (Y.D. 286: 14) rules that it is preferable to place the mezuza of a bedroom on the frame on the outside of the door, the mezuza now being on the exterior of the room when the door is closed, thus avoiding issues of honoring the kedusha of the mezuza, including yours.
If it cannot be done, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that Hashem’s name on the mezuza case requires double covering, similar to the parchment inside. (See Agur Beohalecha 9:5, Shaarei Mezuza 18: 8). He added, that you may be lenient in need, if the name of Hashem is written or engraved vertically.
Cards and posters that have Hashem’s names or psukim, should also not be displayed in a bedroom.”
If the seforim are closed Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it remains prohibited until they are doubly covered.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 1/4/2018 5:49 PM |
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# 1575 Don’t Bottle Up
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Q. I received a bottle of whiskey as a gift from a non-religious Jew. Do I need to be concerned that it was possibly owned by him during Pesach (e.g., maybe he keeps whiskey in his house year round and when the need arises gives it to someone as a gift, or maybe he purchased the whiskey from a Jewish-owned store that owned it during Pesach? Does it make a difference when I received it (in December or in April)? It is not possible to ask him where he got it from without embarrassing him.
A. The prohibition of chometz after Pesach is Rabbinical. Mishna Berura (449: 5) mentions that Poskim disagree on sofek or doubtful chometz that should in principle be permitted as other doubtful Rabbinical prohibitions are, if that includes eating or only deriving benefit. He mentions that even the opinions that prohibit eating, it is only immediately after Pesach, when it is likely that it was on a Jewish domain during the Yom Tov.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that in your case there may be other additional doubts, since some non-religious individuals also sell their chometz or are included in the sale by others. Therefore the whiskey is permitted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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Posted 1/4/2018 12:04 PM |
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# 1574 Bury One’s Head In the Sand?
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Q. My friend's sister-in-law does not keep mitzvos, except for Shmiras HaLoshon, which she keeps rigorously. She is also "married" to a gentile.
Should she die, is someone obligated to inform the Chevra Kadisha and/or Cemetery officials that she has intermarried?
Or may one refrain from offering the information?
Supposedly one cannot lie if asked. Can one somehow avoid answering?
If the gentile dies first (no, I am not considering expediting the matter), does this change anything in the psak?
May one pray that the gentile (who is, mind you, decent, as far as gentiles go) die soon or first? Or might that have a deleterious effect on the one praying, such that they might scrutinize his Heavenly record more carefully to see if he himself deserves to hold onto his mortal coil?
May G-d help clean up these messes. Jews should marry Jews; Gentiles Gentiles.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it depends on which section of the cemetery one is planning to acquire a burial site. There are different congregations and societies that own their section and they have different conditions for acceptance. It is both proper and wise to be open and truthful about the status of the person to be laid to rest in the plot, to avoid likely conflict when time is crucial.
In principle, there should be at least one section in a large community beth hakvaroth that would permit the interment of a Jewish person who intermarried.
We do not pray for the demise of people, we daven rather for their repentance and teshuva.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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Posted 1/3/2018 2:03 PM |
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# 1573 It’s a Pleasure
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Q. I would like to take the opportunity to thank Rav Miller, Rav Bartfeld, and the rest of the dedicated staff that are involved in Ask the Rabbi for their prompt attention to our questions, complex or otherwise. It is a Kiddush Hashem, it makes the Torah beloved in our eyes, and shows us all that there is a solution in the Torah to all our doubts.
A shul has places, with ease, for 50 men. However, only 25 men attend prayers on the Yomim Nora'im, when the shul charges money for seats. Can a person argue that he will attend shul without paying, and sit in a seat that will remain empty in any case, according to the principle of Zeh Neheneh V'zeh Lo Chaser? (One derives pleasure while the owner does not suffer a loss)
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that the gabaim or directors of the shul representing the mispalelim, have the authority to charge the attendants for the services provided whatever it is deemed to be fair to guarantee the survival of the institution. This case is similar to deriving pleasure from a now vacant property that is standing to be rented, and therefore not exempt from rent charges. (Baba Kama 20a, Rambam - G'zeila Veabeida 3: 9, Shulchan Aruch C.M. 363).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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Posted 1/3/2018 11:31 AM |
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# 1572 Hear the End Of It
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Q: A congregation voted almost unanimously (two abstentions) to appoint Rabbi Ploni. After the vote was held, a few important members, though non elected by the congregation and not appointed specifically by them, went ahead and wrote a contract with the Rabbi, delineating his obligations to the congregation, what he was not obligated to do, what was the extent of his authority, and their obligations to the Rabbi. None of this was discussed with the congregation and they were unaware of the contract and its contents for almost two decades.
At this point when the Rabbi begins to assert his authority in ways not against the Halacha, but unexpected by the congregation, such as making subtle changes to the Minhagim of the schul, on the basis of his contract, is the congregation obligated to respect the details of the contract and heed his instructions?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that in monetary cases where different parties are involved in contradicting demands, the proper conduct is to avoid expressing any opinion until one has heard the claims of all parties involved, when they are all gathered and can voice in the presence of the others, their particular assertions and rights. (Shemoa bein acheichem, Devarim 1: 16 - Sanhedrin 7b – C.M. 17: 5).
They should present the case to a recognized and competent local Rabbinical authority, who also has the means to verify their claims.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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Posted 1/3/2018 11:29 AM |
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# 1571 Don’t Get Carried Away
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Q. I attended a city-wide gathering called for by Horav Shlomo in 2000 in which he asked the city to take upon themselves to not use the Eruv (i.e., not to be meikal just because it's there and available and not become accustomed to reliance on Eruv but not due to any halachic problem with it) and Rabbi Furer of Bobov asked the city to take upon themselves to not eat out at restaurants. I dutifully followed R Shlomo's request and for the past 17 years do not use the Toronto Eruv. Why is it that no one else has followed R Shlomo's request? Can I too have his permission to abandon it?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion, reflects other Poskim, and has always been that any large city eiruv relays on a number of different leniencies and therefore can be defined as being non-glatt.
Actually, there are hundreds of Bnai Torah in this city, that avoid carrying in the eiruv of any city, at least when not in need.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 1/1/2018 8:49 PM |
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# 1570 Wine and Din
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Q. One has a choice to either make Havdalah himself and let someone else drink the wine, or to delay making Havdalah until a little bit later and make it himself and drink the wine. (If he does the first choice, he cannot drink the wine, because he needs to drive.) Which is preferable (one should generally not delay doing a mitzvah)?
Also, one has a choice: make Havdalah on wine, and someone else will drink, or make on chamar medina and drink himself. Which is better?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it is best to recite havdalah early and not to delay a mitzva on hand (Mechilta Bo 9), then drink a small sip of the wine and give the rest to one listening to the brocho, who will not be affected by drinking the wine.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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Posted 12/31/2017 3:57 PM |
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# 1569 Means to an End
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1) Q. Gut Voch, - I don’t know if this question was asked, but is one permitted to extinguish their menorah flames if they are still burning by the time one goes to sleep? (And they have been lit for at least 30 min).
Thank you.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it is best to wait a half an hour after the time that someone usually keeps for ending Shabbos, before extinguishing the lights of the menorah.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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Posted 12/31/2017 3:41 PM |
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# 1568 Greetings and Salutations
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Q. My neighbor is not shomer mitzvos, but I make a point to always great him warmly. Then when he drives his car on Shabbos (going to his shul), he makes a point if he sees me walking by, to open his window and say loudly Good Shabbos! Do I have to answer him? Should I be concerned that my not answering may be pushing him away from becoming a baal teshuva? Or maybe my greeting him back shows openly that Shabbos is not that important to me, and that is a great chilul Hashem. What is Horam Miller’s opinion?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that you should not ignore him and simply and warmly say; Thank You.
The Rov added that you may try to invite him for a Shabbos meal, to be mekarev him.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 12/29/2017 2:23 PM |
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# 1567 Well, What Do You Know
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Q. How come the Shulchan Aruch says we don’t know what happened on the 9 of Teveis, and if we don’t know what happened, why should it be declared a fast day at all?
A. Indeed Shulchan Aruch (O.H. 580: 2) counts as one of the days that misfortunes occurred to our forefathers and it is proper to fast on them, the Ninth of Teves. The Mechaver adds; but we do not know what happened on that day.
Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a mentioned that the fact that we don’t know or we don’t remember today the historical reason why a decree or minhag was enacted, does not constitute grounds enough for not keeping it.
However, Mishna Berura (ibid. 13) indicates that in the selichos recited on this day, it is mentioned that the day marks the yohrtzait of Ezra Hasofer. Why we would observe the demise-anniversary of Ezra more than so many others we do not (such as the Avos or Aharon Hacohen) could be explained by what Tosafos Chadoshim on Megilas Taanis elucidates. This day actually marks the birth of “Oisso Hoish” and it coincides more or less with the winter solstice. Traditionally it was the occasion of pagan festivities such as Saturnalia. Later on, the Church, as it often did, adopted it and made it coincide with the birth in Betlechem of Yeshu and the celebration of Christmas, better known in our tradition as the night of “Nitel.” (From the term for being-born in Latin)
Since the event, turned out to be catastrophic to our nation, giving rise to all kinds of severe persecutions, inquisitions and many a holocaust, it was therefore established as a day of mourning and fasting. The fact that the reason was hidden and deemed forgotten or was disguised by Ezra’s yortzait, was simply to avoid further conflict with the Church, that would only increase their antisemitism and abuse.
This day follows the Eight of Teves, also a time for fasting mentioned in Shulchan Aruch (ibid.). It marks the day the Torah was translated into Greek. This gave rise to false and mendacious interpretations of the text, and thus gave authority and validity to the New Testament.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a.
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Posted 12/28/2017 11:11 PM |
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# 1566 Furious Fast?
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Q. Is there any truth that one should be machmir to fast on Asarah Beveth more than another taanith? Therefore, even someone who because of age and weakness does not fast besides Yom Kipur and Tishaa Beav, should fast on Asarah Beteveth? If correct why is that so?
A. Beis Yosef (O.H. 550) quotes Avudraham’s opinion that if Asarah Beteves was to occur on Shabbos we would fast on that day, since it is similar to Yom Kippur in which the pasuk mentions “beetzem hayom haze” (Yechezkel 24).
Toras Chaim (550: 4), wonders why Bais Yosef would mention the above detail since it does not have a practical difference, as this fast day cannot according to our luach coincide with Shabbos. He explains that it may be for the purpose of being more stringent on this taanis than others and other prohibitions, such as washing also apply. He mentions that his own father, the Machane Chaim, on the end of his life, when he was very weak and was not supposed to fast, he forced himself to do so on Asarah Beteves.
Biur Halocho (551: 1) mentions that some maintain in Asarah Beteves the stringencies of the Nine Days.
Ratz Katzvi (16) maintains that on this taanis a baal nefesh should begin fasting from the night before. Weddings should therefore be avoided on that night.
Bnei Isoschor (Teves14) explains that this fast day marks the very beginning of the churban and all the days of avelus that we maintain, and is therefore more severe and strict.
However, in practice many Poskim maintain that one does not have to be more rigorous than in other fast days (Shulchan Aruch and Mishna Berura 550:1, Maharam Mibrisk 3: 29, Nitei Gavriel – Chanuka 60: 3 et. al.)
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is similar.
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Posted 12/27/2017 12:28 AM |
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# 1565 Remains To Be Seen
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Q. Why is it that we burn the leftover oil, half burned wicks and candles from Chanuka, but we don’t do so for the remains of Shabbath or Yom Tov candles?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a pointed to Tosafos Shabbos (44a) who asks this very question and as explained in Kehilas Yaakov (18) it is mainly due to the fact that the lights of Shabbos are for the purpose of one’s private use, and would expect to use any leftovers. therefore our sages did not impose a issur hana’ah or benefit prohibition on them. Chanuka lights however are mainly lit for pirsumei nissa , or for publicizing the great miracle occurred, not for one’s use and one cannot derive any benefit from the remains, therefore, whatever is left is burned. (See Tosafos Harosh ibid. for two similar answers)
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 12/26/2017 12:12 AM |
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# 1564 Mezo-Not Yes
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Q. On Rosh Chodesh there is a mitzvah to increase in eating, and even to have a seuda with bread (not an obligation). A working person who is at work basically the whole day and shkia is very early - how is he to be mekayem this mitzvah (it is not always possible to wash for bread at work due to lack of sinks outside the bathroom....)? And sometimes one is so busy that he doesn’t even eat lunch at all. Perhaps one can fulfill the mitzvah by just having a special drink?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that you can comply with the seudas Rosh Chodesh requirement, by eating mezonos when in need.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 12/25/2017 11:44 AM |
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# 1563 Hurts To Ask
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Q. An anorexic person committed suicide by hanging herself from a tree. Is her mental condition such that she is treated as if she died from natural causes, or as a suicide?
A. See questions above. As mentioned before, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is similar to other Poskim, that when there is doubt if the individual who committed suicide was in a psychologically stable state of mind, we treat the case as one who died by natural causes.
Some Poskim maintain that one is treated as a meaved atzmo lodaas or "self-murderer," only when he was given proper warning or hassroa, and after being informed and cautioned of the great sin he is about to commit, and what it entails, he willingly and with a clear mind accepts verbally the consequences. (Divrei Sholom Y.D. 175 quoting Sdei Chemed and others).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 12/25/2017 11:40 AM |
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# 1562 Benefit Of The Doubt
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Q. An anorexic person died from complications related to the on-going overall decline in her bodily health. Is that termed a suicide?
A. Anorexia Nervosa is a serious, potentially life threatening mental illness and eating disorder. It is characterized by an abnormally low body weight, intense fear of gaining weight and a distorted perception of body weight disease: it enjoys the highest fatality rate of any psychiatric disorder. (National Eating Disorders Collaboration, et. al.).
As mentioned in the last question, Halacha (Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 345: 2) considers the one who committed suicide to be a meaved atzmo lodaas, only if he committed suicide when in a psychologically stable state of mind.
When there are any doubts, the assumption of the Poskim is that a suicide was not psychologically stable, and it is treated as one who died by natural causes.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that a medical professional familiar with the case as well as a competent Rabbi should be consulted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 12/24/2017 9:56 PM |
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# 1561 Dead Serious
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Q. How (and why) do the minhagim and halachos relating to the deceased through suicide differ from one who passed away from natural causes?
A. Halacha considers suicide to be tantamount to murder, as the Torah rules (Bereshis 9:5 ), “the blood of your own lives I will demand of you.” (Baba Kama 91b) and looses his part in Olam Habaah, therefore Shulchan Aruch (Y. D. 345: 1) rules that one who commits suicide in principle is denied the after-death honors and privileges of aveilus (mourning): No keria or rending of clothes and eulogies are offered for the deceased, and burial in the main section of the Jewish cemetery is normally not allowed.
There are many details involved in what is considered the honor to the deceased and what is the respect of the living which may be permitted. There are also many specific Halachos that define who in fact committed suicide and who did not, therefore, a competent Rabbi should be consulted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 12/24/2017 3:54 PM |
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Important Numbers
