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Have a question? Send it in! Questions are answered by Rabbi Bartfeld.
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#5423 - Women Not Working, Really?
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-– Q. Kvodo Shlit’a. I overheard in a shiur on line something truly strange, that women should not do work during the nights of Sefirat Haomer. Is that really true? How come I have not seen anyone even the most frum families keeping this prohibition?
A. Indeed Shulchan Aruch (493: 4) writes that women have the tradition not to do any “Melacha” or work from Pesach until Shemini Atzeres from the sunset onward.
Mishna Berura (ibid. 18) adds as other Poskim agree, that the above also includes men. (See next Shailos).
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Posted 5/20/2025 7:35 PM |
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#5422 More Victory to this day!
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- Q. See question above. Can one avoid learning a shiur for attending a Victoria day celebration or parade?
A. See answer above, as the same applies. Our Rabbanim added that the a real true great honor, recognition and thanks to be given to our best extraordinary country of our abode, is indeed honoring it with the learning of our holy Torah also in its behalf, merit and well being.
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Posted 5/19/2025 12:01 PM |
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#5421 A Victory Day!
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- Q. Dear Rov, could you kindly ask Rav Miller Shlit’a and the other Rabbonim of the group if there is any problem in attending the parade and fireworks of Victoria day with our children?
A. Victoria Day (French: Fête de la Reine, lit. 'Celebration of the Queen') is a federal Canadian public holiday observed on the last Monday preceding May 25 to honour Queen Victoria, who is known as the "Mother of Confederation". The holiday has existed in Canada since at least 1845, originally on Victoria's natural birthday, May 24. It falls on the Monday between the 18th and the 24th (inclusive) and, so, is always the penultimate Monday of May (May 19 in 2025 and May 18 in 2026).
Victoria Day is a federal statutory holiday, as well as a holiday in six of Canada's ten provinces and all three of its territories. The holiday has always been a distinctly Canadian observance and continues to be celebrated across the country. It is informally considered the start of the Summer Season in Canada. (Wikipedia).
On question 3713 we wrote:
“Dear Rov Shlit’a is there a problem celebrating Victoria Day by going to a park and watching the fireworks, because of; ‘Lo Telchu Bechukot Hagoyim,’ (following the traditions of the nations)?
A. Victoria Day is not a religious holiday, as is amply recorded. It celebrates the birthday of Queen Victoria, who was the ruling monarch at the time of Canada’s birth as a country in 1867. It’s a day to celebrate all the wonderful things that make Canada the great country it is.
Therefore, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that there is no prohibition of ‘Lo Telchu Bechukot Hagoyim,’ involved. (See also question 3329 regarding that it is also propitious to include the date in a shul or school Luach).”
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that one who can and learns Torah should continue doing so and leave the Victoria day celebration to those who don’t.
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Posted 5/19/2025 11:58 AM |
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#5420 The Purim-Lag Blo-Omer!
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- Q. Dear Rabbi, I overheard on a recent shiur that Lag Baomer and Purim are closely related, Is that really true?
A. Indeed it is true on question 2187 we wrote:
“Q. Shulchan Aruch (428) writes that Lag Baomer is always the same day of the week a Purim. (Siman P’lag). What is the connection between them?
A. Many different interpretations have been given to the connection between the two unalike festivities.
To mention only a few; some dwell on Cabalistic teachings that are common to both (Imrei Noam, Givaas Pinchas, et.al.) Others, stress similarities such as the unity of the Nation, that when it was lacking it was the cause of the threat and danger, but when it was mended it became the source of salvation. (Sheloh, quoted by Vayechi Yosef: p.254).
The development and advancement of the non-written parts of the Torah, such as the Torah Shebaal Peh and the Toras Hanistar, is also mentioned (Chazon Lamoed: 18).
R”N of Breslov (Otzar Lag Baomer p. 128) maintains that both days are unique and unparalleled in their attribute and dimension of Hashem listening to our tefilos and prayers and both are comparable to Yom Kippur.
Others see the nexus in the minhag of some of attending the kever of Rashbi during Purim also.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that the association may relate to the “Venahapoch Hu” or total inverse or opposite change, that characterized both occasions.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 5/16/2025 1:39 PM |
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#5419 A More Trimming Teshuva?
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- Q. See questions above. In general, can a married woman cut or trim he hair during Sefirah if required?
A. Some Poskim include women in the prohibition of cutting and trimming hair during Sefira (Pri Megodim 551: 47).
Igrois Moishe (Y.D. 2: 137) and others rule that one should be stringent when not in need, as when required to have one’s hair covered, or attending Tevila. See Piskei Teshuvos 493: 8.
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Posted 5/16/2025 1:33 PM |
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#5418 A Trimming Teshuva?
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- Q. See question above. The bride while they were dating had her hair cut as needed. She wants to know if it was permitted or she has to Teshuva now?
A. As mentioned above Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that when in need, since the clothing is done for a specific great mitzva, there is place to be lenient as necessary.
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Posted 5/16/2025 1:31 PM |
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#5417 Now, Lets Address the Dress!
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- Q. See question above. The couple bought some very proper and expensive clothing for the wedding ceremony, as corresponds to their wealthy families. How early on Thursday, can they dress and recite Sheheyanu?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that as mentioned above in need, since the clothing is done for a specific great mitzva, there is place to be lenient as necessary.
However, if Sheheyanu is required, it could be recited later at night.
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Posted 5/16/2025 1:29 PM |
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#5416 Decide for the Bride?
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- Q. See question above. Does the answer above also apply for the Kalah? After all she needs more time to prepare, and they also want to make the ceremony as early enough for the youngster of the family to join.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that as mentioned above in need, since the shavings are done for a specific great mitzva, there is place to be lenient as necessary.
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Posted 5/16/2025 1:27 PM |
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#5415 Be Brave and Don’t Shave?
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- Q. Dear Rov Shlit’a. As we spoke by phone, I have a cousin of mine that about a year ago lost his wife, and now he is visiting me, also on a business trip. He happens to be the owner of a number of large corporations and is indeed a very wealthy man.
I suggested to him a great good shiduch and it turned out to be very acceptable to him, and is now already planing his marriage.
After following the necessary preparations with his bride they decided to get married on Lag Baomer, since for busy him, it is the only correct time. The wedding is to take place on Lag Baomer Thursday night (2025), which happens to be unique for both large families to attend.
They have a few unanswered remaining questions. First, since they have youngsters attending the Chupa and they want to do it as early as possible, when is the earliest he can shave? Can he do it after sunset (Shekiah), before proper night?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that in need, since it is for a specific great Mitzva, it can be done then.
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Posted 5/16/2025 1:25 PM |
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#5414 Save Time and Shave on Time
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- Q. Greetings Kvod Rabeinu and best wishes for Lag Baomer.
When is it the proper time to shave and take a haircut on this year (2025) that Lag Baomer is on Friday?
A. Shulchan Oruch (O.H. 493: 2) mentions that the minhag is that one should not take a haircut on Lag Baomer, yet one should wait until next day, unless it happens to be also Erev Shabbos and one does so in the honor of Shabbos.
During the week, the custom of Sefardim is to follow the ruling that one should wait until the 34th day of the Omer in the morning.
The Rema in Hilchos Shabbos (251:2) writes that although it is inappropriate to do melacha on Erev Shabbos afternoon, it is permissible for a Jewish barber to give haircuts in honor of Shabbos all afternoon, even if he charges for his services.
Mishnah Berurah (251:7) explains that this is because it is obvious to everyone that the haircut is in honor of Shabbos. Rav Shmuel Wosner zt”l (Kuntres M’beis Levi 5758 vol. 1, p. 87) writes that one may not get a haircut on Thursday night, but must wait until Friday morning. This was also the opinion of Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Halichos Shlomo - Pesach 11: note 31).
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Posted 5/15/2025 6:06 PM |
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#5413 – The Real Milk of Lag Baomer
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- Q. Kvod Moreinu Shlit”a: Is it true that there is a Minhag (tradition) for some to eat a milchig (milk) seuda on Lag Baomer?
A. Indeed, on question 1701 we wrote:
Nitei Gavriel (Pesachim 3: 59: 22) quoting Ezor Eliahu, quotes a minhag to eat milchig foods on Lag Baomer. The reason given is that during Sefira days, before the completion of the seven weeks, the Jewish Nation is considered to be still in a state of tumah or impurity similar to a nidda, seeking purification.
The final tahara is to be achieved at the time of receiving the Torah on Shavuos.
Since the dam (blood) of a nidda is related to milk production, the process is alluded in eating milchig.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that each person should maintain the traditions and minhogim of his family and community.
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Posted 5/14/2025 7:58 PM |
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#5412 - The Second Always Follows the First?
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- Q. I have a minhag (tradition) in our family that we only eat Matza Shemura in Pesach, does that imply that on Pesach Sheni I have to do the same?
A. On a similar question 979 we wrote
A. As mentioned in other shailos the traditions of Pesach Sheni vary extensively between different communities.
On question 277 in regard to fasting on a Yortzait day on Pesach Sheni we wrote: “Poiskim mention different traditions on Pesach Sheni in regards to reciting Tachanun, saying Slichos when it coincides with sheni chamishi vesheni, delivering eulogies and fasting.
Talmud Chulin 129b cites Megilas Taanis that includes Pesach Zeiro (the Lesser Pesach as Pesach Sheni is also known) in the list of days when eulogies and fasting is prohibited.
Binyan Shlomo (quoted in Sdei Chemed 5 p. 375) explains that although the Megilas Taanis has been in general annulled, Pesach Sheini’s restrictions may remain, as we hope that soon the Bais Hamikdash will be rebuilt and Pesach Sheni will be reinstated.
Followers of some Ashkenazi and Lithuanian traditions do recite tachanun and fast when needed on Pesach Sheni, while Chasidim and Sephardim do not (Likutey Mahariach, Eishel Avrohom 131: 20, Maharsham 6:32, Yalkut Yosef p. 649, Nitei Gavriel – Pesach 3, et al.)
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit”a opinion is that an individual should follow his family’s tradition when it comes to fasting on a Yortzait on Pesach Sheni.”
Indeed some who do celebrate Pesach Sheni eat Matza Shemura and include Maror also as well as the drinking of wine. (Nitei Gavriel ibid.)
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a.
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Posted 5/12/2025 11:37 PM |
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#5411 The First Matza on the Second Pesach
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-The First Matza on the Second Pesach - Q. Dear Rov and friend Shlit’a. Tomorrow Monday 12 of May (2025) will IY”H be the day of Pesach Sheni (Second time to sacrifice the Pesach for those that were unable to do so at the right day).
We have a tradition to eat Matza Shemura on that day, yet we disagree in our family if it is better to eat it for breakfast as early as possible to comply with zerizim makdimin or to eat later on when the Pesach Korban was eaten, which of the two traditions is more correct?
A. On questions i60 and 4972 we wrote:
“There are different traditions in regards to eating matza on Pesach Sheini, or the “Second Pesach,” originally given to those who were unable to bring the first sacrifice of Pesach.
There are those who eat matza at the time the korban would have been brought, which is in the afternoon of the fourteenth of Iyar, (Wednesday this year) following Avnei Nezer as quoted in Klei Chemda, Vaetchanan. This seems to be the prevalent costume according to Nitei Gavriel (Peasch 3, 57).
Others (Dvar Yehoshua 4, 5 et. al.) maintain that the proper time would be at night (Wednesday night this year),as that would have been the time for consuming the korban, in the days of the Bais Hamikdosh.
Some eat the matza at both occasions (Mikdash Yisroel, Shavuos p.141, mentions that this is the minhag of many Chasidim).
S’fas Emes, (Pesachim 89) offers a novel opinion; namely that the korban of Pesach Sheini, unlike the first, could be eaten also during the day.
And finally, there are the many who do not keep this minhag at all (Most S’fardim, Hagra in Maase Rav 181, and Lithuanian Jewry according to Rib’bos Ephraim 2,129).
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that one should maintain his own minhogim and traditions.”
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Posted 5/12/2025 1:01 PM |
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#5410 Honor Our Mothers Today?
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Q. Is it permitted and recommended to celebrate Mothers Day?
We Wrote the following Teshuva for fathers day:
5008 – Q. Is there anything wrong with celebrating the recent Father’s Day to honor and give the rightful thanks and recognition to one’s father? Is that not a real great Mitzvah? How about if they openly declare and imply that one always needs to give their parents special attention on every day a year?
A. Many Poskim and Rabbonim have expressed their disagreement and displeasure with the celebration of Mother’s or Father’s Day for a number of reasons.
Horav Avigdor Miller ZT’L (Toras Avigdor and tape 122 – May 1976) is well known for his prohibitive opinion on celebrating those days, due to Halachic problem of Chukos Hagoim, or following in the ways of the non-Jews.
He writes: “There’s no question that the American public has been sold an item that was created for the purpose of filling the pockets of businessmen. The American public is the real proverbial gull because no matter what you’ll say about Mother’s Day, it’s a day when people make money. Not only florists! Jewelers and bakers and caterers – everyone is lining his pockets because of Mother’s Day.
Now, Mother’s Day (or Father’s day, doesn’t have any significance based on historical reasons or some religious grounds.”
He adds: “’m going to say something that’s going to be fifty percent unpopular. The authenticity of your celebration of Mother’s Day depends on how much you celebrate Father’s Day. Because Father’s Day like Mother’s Day is not genuine. The truth is that Father’s Day was just an afterthought by the businessmen. That’s all. They thought, “If we’re going to cash in on the mothers, so what about the fathers too?” But it turned out to be a flop. Father’s Day is a very small business item. So they sell a few cuff links, a few cheap things to give the old man; but it’s Mother’s Day – that’s the big day!
And you’re taught that you’d better observe it – or else. And how many fights have arisen between husbands and wives because of insufficient appreciation of Mother’s Day! “Mother’s day!” she says to him. “That’s how you’re going to celebrate my day!”
“Now, whether observing Mother’s Day or Father’s Day is a transgression of walking in the ways of the Gentiles, that I’m going to leave it to the Gedolei Yisroel – because I always do that when it’s a Halacha Shailah. and therefore I’m going to limit myself merely to this overview of the origin of these days.”
However, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that when one’s parents indeed expect and appreciate that celebration as do their colleagues and friends, it could be done. Yet, indeed, only when it is specifically mentioned that it applies to all the days of the year and it is also not done on the same day the others celebrate.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a.
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Posted 5/11/2025 3:49 PM |
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#5409 To The Top of The Tree
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- Q. Kevodo Shlita, firstly I want to thank you for the beautiful kiddush the Rov and Rebetzin gave last Shabbos at the Birchas Hailonot, it was really great and very well attended.
I was just wondering, don’t Poskim maintain not to do that brocho on Shabbos as one should not come close to a tree and forget and cut some fruits?
A. Firstly I want to thank you much for joining to the beautiful kiddush my Rebetzn Tih” prepared. You likely came a bit late and also missed some shiurim in shul, since we repeated the next Teshuva hereby incuded.
Q. 4967. You announced that there will be Birchas Hailonos on Shabbos. Does not the Ben Ish Chai and others rule not to allow Birchas Ilonos on Shabbos?
A. To what we already answered: “On question 4219 we were asked:
“Is it better to wait to recite the blessing on the new fruit of the blooming trees on Shabbos with all the family present and with more people?
On question 1708 we addressed the following similar questions: “Since the days of Nissan are over can you still say the bracha for blooming trees with Hashem’s name after Lag Baomer? Is it better to wait until Shabbath to recite it? Is it better to recite it with a minyan? Should one say it and have in mind all, as we do in kiddush?”
To what we answered: “On question 288 we wrote; This year, due to the earliness of Pesach, the blooming of trees at this latitude occurred very late on the Jewish calendar. . In regards to waiting until Shabbos on question 287 we wrote; Yalkut Yosef (Shabbos 3, 319,77) quotes some opinions that maintain that this brocho should not be recited on Shabbos either because by engaging one’s attention on the tree one might come to collect some fruit (Moed L’kol Chai 9), or by dint of a Cabalistic injunction on gathering “nitzoitzois” (spiritual sparks) from a tree on Shabbos (Kaf Hachaim 226, 4).
However most Poiskim disagree and permit reciting this brocho on Shabbos. (Yalkut Yosef ibid. – Nitei Gavriel, Pesach I, 6,7). Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit”a opinion is that you can wait until Shabbos (avoid contemplating the tree) and recite together with a larger group “b’rov am” and have it adjoined to the count of the hundred brochos.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that although no minyan is required for reciting this brocho, since we always maintain that “Berov Am Haddras Melreh” or we honor of the King, when many are present, it would be preferred to have others join.
However the Rov maintains that each one should recite his own brocho.”
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman , Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 5/9/2025 11:58 AM |
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#5408 An Early Party?
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- Q. For those who have the tradition to do a Lag Baomer celebration and dance around the fire with music and divrei Torah. (A siyum as I advised them is also usually done), since this year (2025) that Lag Baomer is on Friday and that can only be done on Thursday evening, can they start already earlier after Shekia, (sunset) since we are up north and night fall is late and we also want children to attend?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that different groups should follow the traditions of their families, however it stands to reason that they should at least wait until the Shekia and begin with the Siyum.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman , Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit”a
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Posted 5/9/2025 11:53 AM |
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#5407 Healing the Healing?
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- See question above. Q. As mentioned above, my father Shlit”a is a great Talmid Hochom and the head of a Yeshiva, he has additional issues of doing a temporary avoidable Aortic Valve Replacement on Friday as although not expected, he is afraid that complications may occur and it may bring him to Chilul Shabbos.
What is Horav Miller’s Shlit”a opinion of the correct thing to do?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that there are various elements and variables to this question and it is worthwhile for the Rov to cautiously reconsider all of them and also it is advisable to consult all details with another competent Halachic authority.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman , Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit’a
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Posted 5/9/2025 11:44 AM |
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#5406 – Don’t Lag the Lag Healing of Lag Baomer!
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- See question above - Q. Thank you so much for your prompt answer. I’m still wondering if for someone who is very religious as my father, who is a great Talmid Hochom and the head of a Yeshiva would accept it. Are there any other suggestions?
A. Let me quote you another Shaila.
“2664 - Q. My father who is in need of a hernia operation in about a month, due to the cancellation of another patient, was given his spot, which is on Lag Baomer. His operation is not that urgent and could wait.
Should he take the opportunity and do it early on Lag Baomer? Is that a correct thing to do?
A. Nitei Gavriel (Pesach 3: 42: 7) quoting from Segulos Yisroel in the name of the Arizal, mentions that Lag Baomer stands for the symbol of Hod ShebeHod, and is a prime day for refuos, healing, and brochos.
Similarly, Tzemach Tzedek, Hilula D’Rashb”i, Lechem Shlomo,Sifsei Tzadikim and others maintain that refuos are granted on Lag Baomer. They mention, that the gematrya of the day also alludes to its unique power.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that in need he should better have the operation early on Lag Baomer.
As mentioned the day has special segulos for yeshuos and refuos.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a”
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Posted 5/9/2025 11:06 AM |
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#5405 Don’t Lag the Healing of Lag Baomer
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- Q. Dear Rov Shlita my father Shlit"a needs a Suture-less Aortic Valve Replacement that could be done in just a few hours. He can have it done on very early Lag Baomer (Friday this year 2025). He made the appointment on that day because he knows well that Lag Baomer is a day that is recommended for Refuah. Is that correct?
A. Sefarim write that indeed the days of Chodesh Iyar are a time of Refuah (healing), especially the days representing hod, and more so Lag B’Omer, which is Hod Sheb’hod. Thus, the 33rd day, which is the fifth day of the fifth week, corresponds to Hod she-be-Hod (Splendor within [the week of] Splendor).
It is an essential sign of true and complete healing.
The Tzemach Tzedek points out that the first letters of מ׳לך ר׳ופא נ׳אמן ו׳רחמן (the True Healing and compassionate King) spell: מרון. In the merit of Rebbe Shimon who is buried in Meron, Hashem will heal the ill.
Indeed if there are Be"H no other complications, the Aortic replacement will end before midday on Friday, he will go ahead. We all wish him a prompt Refuah Shleima.
See next question.
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Posted 5/8/2025 5:52 PM |
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#5404 Cinco De Mayo Kiddush?
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Q. See question above. I have another question. Last Shabbat morning someone in shul offered a kiddush after prayers, and he said it was dedicated for Cinco de Mayo. Was that correct?
A. On question 4243 we wrote:
“Q. Dear Rov and teacher. As you well know, I’m the rabbi of a shul in Mexico. I have an urgent Shaila. We do, as I remember the Rov also did a Friday night Kiddush and seuda for the people who have a wedding, or other Semachot during the incoming week and that helps much to bring people to shul and do kiruv.
Tomorrow Friday is also Cinco de Mayo, and it is as you well know a great civic holiday in our country.
The mayor of our municipality hinted that he would very much like to attend our congregation, as he does with other communities. Since we do have a great interest in keeping good relations with him, can we invite him and his group to our Shabbat party?
There will be security guards and police cars at the entrance of the shul, does it matter?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that considering the needs and issues, he can be invited, if the honorees and participants to the Seuda also agree.
The security guards and police cars at the entrance of the shul, does not really matter much, as in times of need they are common everywhere.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit’a”
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Posted 5/5/2025 8:45 PM |
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Important Numbers
