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# 3986 No Life Interruption
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Q. The shul I go to has a tradition to pause during Kiddush for people to say L'chaim. (during the day and at night. Before saying Borei Pri Hagafen.) I thought this was only permitted for Sephardim as it is considered an interruption for Ashkenazim. Or is it permitted because it is an outreach shul and there is a long tradition of doing it?
A. Since the 'L'chaim' blessing is said before the brocho is recited, there is no issue of Hefsek or interruption.
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Posted 11/20/2022 4:06 PM |
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# 3985 No Kids First - Really!
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Q. Our Rabonim where wondering, if one has to feed his small children before he feeds himself and this happens to be a Biblical mitzva, how come that whenever we make Kiddush or on every Seuda or meal the children are served last?
Are we not transgressing constantly on a Biblical mitzva and prohibition?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit'a explained that the time lapse at a Kiddush or Seuda between serving the kids first to eat or the grownups is so small and inconsequential, that other priorities such as honoring parents, Rabbis, or guest take priority.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/18/2022 12:24 AM |
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# 3984 Get Your Priorities Right
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Q. Does one have to feed his dog before he feeds his small children?
A. Pele Yoetz (Erech Baalei Chaim)mentions that just as it is prohibited to pain one's animals or pets that depend on him, certainly it applies to human beings that also need one's food.
Igrois Moshe (O.H. 2: 52) rules that small children that cannot feed themselves definitely have priority over pets and animals.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/18/2022 12:21 AM |
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# 3983 Tell a Fish Shaila
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Q. See question above. Does one have to feed the fish in his aquarium before he eats his own meal?
A. Sheilas Ya'avetz (1:17) addresses the prior question regarding eating one's meal before feeding his cat or dog. He debates that this household pets may be different to the cattle animals mentioned in the Shema, since they don't have when corraled access to grass or food. Dogs and cats at home may be different, depending on the case.
Mishne Halochos (6: 216) following the above reasoning maintains that aquarium fish may be similar to cattle, since they are also limited to their secluded environment.
However, Shevet Hakehosi (2: 149) maintains that fish in an aquarium may survive if there is plants available or food left over that does not discompose.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/18/2022 12:19 AM |
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# 3982 Cat in the Sack?
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Q. Is it true that it is correct to own a pet like a cat or dog to comply with the mitzva of feeding your animal before you eat?
A. Sefer Chassidim Hechodosh, indeed writes that one should own some pets in his home, so they can be fed before one eats and thus comply with the mitzva mentioned in the Shema, of feeding animals before one eats.
Others quoting the Arizal that on the contrary, there is danger in having pets as one may not take care properly for them, causing them to suffer and will thus be punished, sometimes severely. Peleh Yoetz, Tzavoas Chaim and others maintain a similar point.
See question 2962 regarding if it is appropriate to have a pet dog.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/18/2022 12:14 AM |
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# 3981 Pray Tell How to Pray
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Q. In our Shemonah Esrei when saying the 8th bracha for Refuah and inserting names for cholim, is it appropriate to include individuals with mental health issues? Should one also include names for individuals with a chronic illness (physical and/or mental) that can last for decades and should you say their name each day for years and years?
A. Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a maintains that one should not repeat a tefila for a sick individual suffering from a chronic illness (physical and/or mental) more that thirty days as it may be considered already as part of the brocho.
The prayer for that particular patient should be said at 'Elokay Netzor' after the Shemoneh Esrei.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/18/2022 12:09 AM |
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# 3980 Enlighten the Lights
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Q. I know that Shabbat candle-lighting is supposed to be either where I eat my meal or sleep. I was supposed to eat supper in one location and sleep in another but was (late) coming from home. At the last minute, the sleeping arrangements fell through so I lit and slept at home.
However, what should I have done in the original scenario? Called one or the other and asked them to light for me? If so, would I skip lighting at home. What if I asked the sleeping host to lite and my plans changed at the last minute. Would I still be covered b'dieved?
A. Poskim mention that there are three basic principles and reasons for lighting candles on Shabbos. The first two are Kavod and Oneg Shabbos, or honoring and enjoying Shabbos and they apply basically to lighting candles at the table where one eats. The third reason is Shalom Bayit or having a Shabbos of Peace, referring mainly to not stumbling in a dark room, and it applies mainly at the sleeping room that is usually dark.
Piskei Teshuvos (263: 23: n. 206) mentions that the third reason or lighting candles in the room one sleeps, in practice usually does not apply in our days. The reason being that most bedrooms have windows to a lighted street or there is light on the corridor leading to the room, a bathroom annexed or have a small LED light and thus it is not likely that one may stumble in them. So the fact that you were planing to sleep somewhere else is inconsequential today.
As far as having planned to eat somewhere else where your host lit candles for you thinking you will attend is also of no effect, since you have to light where you actually eat. If that turns out to be in your home, you have to light there with a brocho, before Shabbos begins.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is similar. The Rov's son narrated that the Rosh Hakolel Shlit'a when he is invited to eat Leil Shabbos at his children's home, lights at home before leaving and then when he returns eats some Mezonos where he lit.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/18/2022 12:01 AM |
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# 3979 For the Record -
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Q. See question above. What about my cell phone? Would it matter if it was still on or would it have to be turned off since it might record steps.
A. if the phone was left unwittingly on and it is recording without the owners intention, it is basically of no consequence, after the fact, since it is a 'Dovor Sheino Miskaven' or a not intended Melacha and likely of no use at all.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is similar
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/17/2022 11:58 PM |
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# 3978 Callback the Knapsack?
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Callback the Knapsack? Q. I have a
Shabbat dinner to go to and was wondering if I got there before
candle-lighting, can I store my Presto/bus card in my knapsack over
Shabbos since I will not be returning home? Do I need to
have food in it or anything that I would need over Shabbos
would be enough to keep knapsack from being Muktza. Would it be okay
if I did the same thing with my bank or credit card since I
might have to add money to the card? What about my cell phone? Would
it matter if it was still on or would it have to be turned off since
it might record steps
A.
In principle if there are articles that are considered Muktza inside
the knapsack at the beginning of Shabbos even during sunset, the
knapsack would be considered as a 'Bosis' or base and foundation
supporting the Muktza and thus become also similarly Muktza as ruled
in Shulchan Aruch (O.H. 309).
One
issue would be what kind of Muktza. If money was placed inside the
knapsack, since money is not a usable utensil per se, the type of
Muktza would be more stringent, and cannot be moved at all.
Horav
Shlomo miller's Shlit'a opinion is that credit cards or similar may
be considered a utensil, since they could be used to open a locked
door.
Obviously,
a cell phone is a utensil, but similarly to the cards it is Muktza as
a Keli Shemelachto Leissur,
or prohibited to touch and handle because it is used for forbidden
purposes on Shabbos.
However,
this type of Muktza is more lenient than a non-utensil Muktza, and it
is permitted to touch and move when one requires the use of its space
or even the item itself, as when used for a permitted purpose. An
example would be using a carpentry hammer for cracking edible nuts.
Horav
Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is also that the best way to handle
your case if you need to use or move the knapsack during Shabbos. is
to place before it begins the Muktza articles at the bottom of the
knapsack, while the permitted articles you need should be placed on
top.
Rabbi
A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and
Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/17/2022 11:46 PM |
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# 3977 The Shaila Was Not Forgotten
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Q. Re- question (3975) above that one of the actions mentioned by Talmud Horios (13b) that causes forgetfulness of Torah learning is using one's clothes as a pillow and laying one's head on them.
Is it permitted for one to sleep on a pillow that is covering an underneath pajamas?
How about sleeping with a Kipa that as one lays down and puts his head over a pillow, often separates from the head and one is laying over it. Is that permitted?
A. Mishna Berura (2: 2) mentions that if one places something that separates between his head and the piece of clothing it is possible that there is no concern of forgetting one's learning.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that concerning a Kipa or Kap'l, it is not seen as a separate piece of clothing, but just a something one is wearing, and is similar to laying on the sleeves of one's jacket or shirt, that we mentioned as permitted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/14/2022 3:50 PM |
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# 3976 Lots of Lots
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Q. Dear Rabbi we kindly need a prompt answer. This Shabbat as often happens, we have two attendants that have Yohrzait for their fathers in the same week and are candidates for receiving the Maftir Aliya.
In such a situation we usually cast lots to see who will be awarded the Maftir. On this particular case, one of the Yohrzait candidate's father was a convert that did his Gerus before he married. Does that make any difference as for who we choose for receiving the Maftir?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that it does not and the lots should be cast to decide which son gets the Maftir.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 11:05 PM |
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# 3975 A Not to Forget Shailah
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Q. Dear Rov. As is well known one of the actions mentioned that causes forgetfulness of Torah learning is using one's clothes as a pillow and laying one's head on them. Why then do people commonly even in a Beis Medresh when seating next to a Shtender or table, lay their heads over their arms and fall asleep for a while, when actually laying their heads over the sleeves of their jackets or shirts?
A. Indeed the above is one of five actions that promote forgetfulness of Torah learning mentioned by Talmud Horios (13b), and is also mentioned by Mishna Berura (2: 2).
Sefer Zikaron maintains that sleeping over the clothes that one is wearing, is not related to the above, since those clothes are considered as part of himself and not as sleeping over "clothes."
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 11:02 PM |
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# 3974 Welcome to the Welcome
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Q. Another Hachnasat Orchim (welcoming of guest question) - Rabbi. My wife and I, are engaged for years in being Mekarev people by inviting then to the Friday night Seuda. These are individuals, men and women that are not necessarily religious at all, and when seating at the table they talk between them not only 'Devarim Betelim" (unworthy not Torah words) but likely also Lashon Hara'ah, anti-religious statements and other forbidden speech also.
Is this permitted? What do other people who carry on similar Hachnasat Orchim and Kiruv programs do? Do the end results permit the questionable beginnings?
A. Some Poskim do permit saying Devarim Betelim or words without value to rejoice the guest (Minchas Shabbos - Shiurei Mincha p. 157.
Toldos Yaakov Yosef quotes the Baal Shem Tov that for the purpose of Kiruv, even questionably prohibited words can be said. (See also Naharos Eison 20: 4).
Out of experience, the best way to carry on properly these most important and transcendental Kiruv - Shabbos meals properly and effectively, is to have a program already prepared well before. Not only the singing of Zemiros together is essential, but most important is the engagement in interesting Divrei Torah and stories that people want to hear and enjoy.
I have seen some hosts asking their guest, not to bring any presents, but rather to prepare a nice 'Vort' (short Torah saying) that they can repeat at the table.
Not only does a well prepared program make the meal a beautiful and memorable experience, it is a real truly very effective tool for Kiruv.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 11:00 PM |
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# 3973 Honor the Guest of Honor
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Q. Rabbi. Some relatives are visiting and staying with us and we are expected to pick them up from the airport. If I usually attend at that time a Torah shiur. Is it correct that I should call an Uber service and attend my daily Torah Shiur.
A. Talmud (Shabbos 127a) makes a surprising radical statement: "Greater is Hachanasat Orchim (welcoming guests) than receiving the Divine Presence." Achavas Chesed (3: 1) rules accordingly and recommends he attend preferably to his guest, when they are people of importance or no one else is available to receive them.
However, if he is the one teaching the Shiur, since then the Torah learning of many is involved he should provide other ways to receive his guest.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that, even when he is only attending the Shiur, that takes precedence.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:55 PM |
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# 3972 The Thoughts that Count
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Q. Dear Rov. My grandfather became totally paralyzed, but seems to be he is conscious. I know he would very much like to put on Tefilin every day as he did all his life. Can I put Tefilin on his paralyzed hand? Can I make a bracha for him?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that you should not put on Tefilin on your grandfather, since he is unable to watch and keep himself clean and that is essential on putting on Tefilin.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:53 PM |
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# 3971 Identity Crisis
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Q. A most unusual case was encountered by a Yeshiva student that is part of a Baal Teshuva family, On a recent Friday, while looking through some old family documents, found the conversion certificate of his maternal grandmother. To his overwhelming shock he realized it was a done by a Conservative temple, after searching online and contacting the institution, it became obvious to him that it was invalid since the people signed on it were not Shomer Shabbos.
Since all over sudden to his profound distress, he realized he is not Jewish and cannot daven and even keep Shabbos, he contacted us to see what could be done on the half a day before Shabbos begins.
A. We recommended him to immediately contact his Rov or Rosh Hayeshiva. Indeed he was able to make an appointment for a Beis Din to come together on the Monday after, and do an act of Orthodox Gerus.
After consulting with Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit'a, we told him to get immediately three unrelated teachers or friends from his Yeshiva and ask them to meet at the local Kosher Mikva and undergo an act of Gerus or conversion accepting all mitzvos of the Torah. He required prior to that also an act of "Hatofas Dam Bris" or drawing a few drops from the place of Bris Mila which he had. That should be preferably done by a Mohel before entering the Mikva.
He was indeed successful in performing before Shabbos began his emergency conversion.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:51 PM |
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# 3970 Break the Ice Bread?
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Q. If one is missing a Chala for Lechem Mishna can he use a frozen one from the freezer?
A. On question 1582 regarding an individual (invited) at the meal has a dietary restriction and can only eat certain special types of bread (e.g., gluten free, spelt), should the special loaf (even if it is not whole) be placed together with the main Lechem Mishneh receiving hamotzi from the baal habeis?
To what we answered: "Many Poskim maintain that one complies with Lechem Mishne even when one is unable to eat from the second accompanying Chala, such as a frozen bread. (Teshuvos Vehanhogos 2: 170, Minchas Yitzchok 9: 42, Shevet Hakehossi 2: 116, Nishmas Shabbos 2: 157, et. al.). However, one should on the onset, have a complete bread of the kind he can eat.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that if the Baal Habais is reciting the brocho and is being Moitze everyone else present with his brocho, it is better that the special bread should also be placed with the others, so the brocho will be recited on it too."
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:48 PM |
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# 3969 Know Where You Stand
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Q. Does one have to stand and honor a Rabbi, parent or elderly person when he is seen through a window, a glass or plastic partition in a shul (Mechitza) or a mirror?
A. Horav Chaim Palachi zt'l in Zechira Lechaim (Behaaloscha) mentions that one is not obliged to stand for the ones he has to honor, even when they are close by (four Amos), when they are seen through glass or a mirror.
However, Hilchos Ketanos (1: 274) disagrees and rules one should stand.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that since the parent and offspring are in different domains, even if they can see each other there is no obligation to stand.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:43 PM |
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# 3968 Stand Corrected?
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Q. Dear Rabbi. I have always wondered since I'm both a son and a father, why is it that children don't stand for their parents in our days when they enter the room they are? Is that not part of the mitzva of Kivud Av Vaem (honoring your father and mother) that certainly applies today.
A. Sefer Chasidim (152 - See also Hava'as Da'as Y.D. 240: 19) maintains that parents can and should forgive their honor due from their children, to avoid their being punished when, as it often happens, they don't comply properly with the mitzva.
Bris Olam (ibid.) further explains that although it seems that parents can only forgive the 'Dinei Adam" or the enforceable rulings, but not the spiritual mitzva itself, on small issues they are empowered to forgive completely.
Teshuvos Vehanhagos (3: 276) debates the difficulty of parents forgiving the respect due to them since it is compared to the honor that we must give to Hashem. He advises to at least demand they stand twice a day.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that it depends on the situation and where the parents and offspring are.
When the father enters a shul or Bais Midrash it is common for the sons to stand up. It also varies on local Minhogim and each should follow his family traditions.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:39 PM |
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# 3967 Pray Tell Me!
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Q. On question 1892 you mentioned that Horav Miller rules that a person who is davening Maariv on Motzei Shabbos 50 minutes past sunset, and his custom is to prolong Shabbos for 72 minutes, to say the Havdala of Ata Chonantanu, even if he still keeps the prohibition of doing work until that time has arrived.
Why is it permitted to say the above since it contains a Tefila for the personal needs of the coming weekdays we are about to start and those should not be said on Shabbos?
A. Actually there are several prayers we recite during Shabbos for our personal needs. Some examples are 1) Tazileni Meazei Panim after the brochos of the morning. 2) Sim Shalom. 3)Elokai Netzor after Shemone Essrei. 4) Yekum Purkan before Musaf. 5) Birchas Hachodesh before the beginning of the month, and others.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that only the reciting of private Tefilos on personal needs is avoided during Shabbos to avert thinking of those needs and getting involved in the worries and pains they reflect, that is forbidden during our day of rest and enjoyment.
However, the Rov maintains that when those Tefilos are printed in Sidurim and all say them, they are not part of the above injunction. The same would apply to the the prayer included in Ato Chonantonu.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 11/10/2022 10:36 PM |
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Important Numbers
