We never outgrow the wish for our parents' approval. Even in those cases where a person must admit - at least intellectually - that his or her parents just can't give it, the yearning for it doesn't diminish. We can - and should - step in and offer ....
When we show plenty of affection and approval to a child, we can get away with occasional displays of displeasure and anger. We are, after all, human and we do, after all, feel real irritation from time to time as we go through our parenting day. N ....
In the heat of the parenting or marriage moment, the goal is to minimize damage. When a child or partner is intensely agitated or upset, YOU cannot force him or her to turn off those feelings; you can only (if you are physically safe) remain calm a ....
When you make your child's teacher feel appreciated and supported, your CHILD benefits. Get on the teacher's team: acknowledge whatever challenges your child has and figure out together, how to best help. Be sure to let the teacher know how much th ....
When you've said something to a loved one that you now regret, first forgive yourself. Then ask your loved one to forgive you for your inappropriate outburst. Then forgive your loved one for triggering you to the point that you said something that ....
No one is as hard on you as you are on yourself. No one is thinking all night about the sweater you wore to the event. No one is worrying all day about the fact that you fed your kids macaroni and cheese for 2 days in a row. In fact, no one cares m ....
There's no point in worrying about your child...what will be, will be. There IS value, however, in focusing your attention on the child's strengths and nurturing them to the best of your ability. Keep them uppermost in your mind at all times (even ....
If you know your spouse isn't good at something - disciplining the kids, arriving on time, organizing papers or whatever - and you've known this for many years already, consider giving up the hope that he or she will ever develop this skill or tale ....
We are all limited - great at some things, not so great at others. You hope that people will accept you despite your weak points. You hope that they will overlook your flaws. And in this hope you are totally correct; why should others focus their a ....
When a child has a task to do (take out the garbage, do his homework, set the table or whatever, resist the urge to remind and prompt and remind and nag and remind and remind! Such behavior on your part only teaches the child that he doesn't need t ....
Sometimes, you can't get your child to do what you want her to do; you feel completely helpless. And then, you may erupt in rage, hoping that you will be able to "force" her to comply. But even if you succeed, you and she both feel the awfulness of ....
We can never know what our children are thinking or what secrets they are keeping from us. All too often, children and teens are afraid to share experiences with their parents that they experience as shameful or overwhelming. In their attempt to co ....
Provide a healthy, happy model. Be kind and respectful. Teach your values and set appropriate limits. Then pray your heart out, because the way your child turns out is NOT solely up to you. What is UP to you, is what you do and say.
Friends ....
It's normal to feel confused in parenting. Should I let my child do this activity or not? Should I discipline him or ignore what he's doing? Should I change my mind or stay firm? Does it matter if I'm the only parent who insists on "xyz" or is it u ....
When a spouse or child says something angrily, it is tempting to respond by correcting his or her style: "Don't speak to me that way!" While it WILL be important to talk about HOW this person communicates to you, NOW is not the time. Obviously the ....
When a spouse or child has done something wrong, don't ask him or her why he or she did it. You don't want to force loved ones to admit that they were careless, stupid, neglectful or otherwise deficient! People do things wrong because they are huma ....
Instead of complaining to your loved ones about what WASN'T done, thank them for what WAS done.
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When your child is in the middle of doing something wrong, and you want to stop her from continuing to do it, do you call her by her name? How does that sound to her? "LEAH!!! STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!" How often will she hear her name spoken in that ha ....
Using endearments ("Sweetie," "Honey" and the like) when speaking to loved ones, reminds them that they ARE loved ones. Using them also makes you feel both more loving and more lovable.
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When your kids are little, you don't mind cleaning up after them. As they get older, you expect them to chip in and do their part. As they become even bigger, you expect them to help out beyond cleaning up their own personal messes; they are "membe ....
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