If being married is a necessity in receiving perfection, why did the Bnei Yisroel separate from their wives before the giving of the Torah?
ANSWER:
Everything has a time and a place. The Bnei Yisroel were not told to divorce their wives before Matan Torah, it was only three days of separation. And you have to know that although a man's career with his wife is a career of simcha and it helps him attain perfection, but there are times when for the purpose of greater perfection we yield smaller perfections. For three days they separated - a very small sacrifice - to demonstrate that they were getting ready for this great gift, the greatest gift that will ever be conferred by Hashem on anyone; the Torah.
That's what we find in the case of Rabbi Akiva and his wife, they separated even more, there the question is a bigger question, you can ask some more questions. Don't forget children could have been born during this time! People are willing to sacrifice - not by contraception - they are willing to sacrifice the pleasures, the benefits, and the achievements of married life, for the sake of greatness in Torah, these are the people who are marked for greatness.
In old generations this took place, there were Perushim in Europe who left home, they were not able to remain home and support a family, so their wives gave them permission or even told them to go. They went to other towns and they were Perushim, they sat and studied Torah. Some used to come home once a year to their families.
The Jewish nation is the nation that appreciates marriage more than anyone else. Marriage is a big mitzvah among Jews, and it's encouraged at anearly age, and every effort is made that everyone should be married. In true Jewish communities they marry off all unmarried people; nobody is allowed to remain unmarried in a real Jewish community. But, the true Jewish community understands also that for the sake of achievement in the service of Hakadosh Baruch Hu, the greatest sacrifices are worth offering.
And that's why we had great men in the past like Rabbi Akiva and others who were willing, with the assistance of great women who are behind them, to deny themselves the happiness and also the benefits of married life, for the sake of the achievements that they achieved for themselves and for theirpeople. The people benefited by them.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Important Numbers
