1) It is forbidden for a male to gaze at a female who is not dressed modestly as doing so will bring him to forbidden thoughts. (See Mishna Berura Siman 75:1)
In the event that a male must speak with or otherwise be near a female who is not dressed properly , if he can do so without gazing at her it is permissible to do so even if there is a possibility that he may inadvertently see her.
2) However, if he knows that there is no way that he will be able to speak with her or be near her without intentionally gazing at her, it is prohibited for him to put himself in that situation, and he must found a different avenue to accomplish what he set out to do without going there. (See Shach Yoreh Deah Siman 142:34 and Chochmas Adam Klal 84:16)
Moreover, if a male is somewhere first and a non modest female arrives there afterwards, unless totally necessary for him to be there for a valid reason and he knows he wont gaze at her intentionally, he must leave that area. (See Shu"t Igros Moshe Orach Chaim Vol. 1 Siman 123)
The above is true even if by having to leave the area or not go in the first place, it will result in Tircha, hardship or monetary loss, as hardship or losing money is not an acceptable reason to transgress Issurim. (See Pnei Yehosua to Pesachim 25b Dibur Hamaschil Itmar)
Halachos for Shabbos Kodesh
1) If a male has no valid reason (e.g. Parnasa or medical) to go to a place where immodest women are found, it is prohibited for him to go there even if he is careful not to gaze at them.
Thus, a male is forbidden to go to an immodest beach, boardwalk or another vacation spot where he will surely be in the presence of many immodestly clad females, even if he thinks that he can be careful not to gaze.
One who disregards this Halacha and goes to such a place anyhow, is deemed a Rasha. (See Talmud Bava Basra 57b, D'Ika Darka Achrina Rasha Hu. See also Shu"t Igros Moshe Even HaEzer Vol. 1 Siman 56)
2) If one needs to go somewhere and he isn't sure if there will be immodestly clad women there or not, or if he has a valid reason to go to a place where there are such females, but he isn't certain that he will have to gaze at them, he may go. (Taz Orach Chaim Siman 316:3 where he rules that if it isn't a Pesik Reisha or even a Safek Pesik Reisha is permitted. However, see Hagahos Rav Akiva Eiger to Yoreh Deah Siman 87:6 where he argues. See also Biur Halacha Siman 316:3 Dibur Hamaschil V'lachen Yesh Lizaher)
Of course, in any of the situations above where he is halachically permitted to go, if he finds himself having forbidden thoughts he must leave at once lest he transgress the prohibition of V'Nishmarta Mikol Davar Ra (Devarim 23:10) or worse transgressions Chas V'shalom. (Igros Moshe ibid)
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QUESTION & ANSWER CORNER
Reader Submitted Questions of interest on topics related to Halachos we covered, as well as other interesting topic and Answers.
These Q&A are taken from the Q & A pages on the Halacha For Today website.
Although the answers I give to questions are taken directly from the Sifrei HaPoskim, and aren't my own, they are still for study purposes only, NOT for Psak Halacha.
Questions can be emailed to HalachaForToday@Yahoo.com
Reader's Question:
What is the mekor (source) and reason for not drinking water during Shalosh Seudos?
Answer:
The Rama Siman 291:2 brings an opinion (based on a Midrash as well as kabalistic sources. See Rabeinu Bachya Shmos 20) not to drink water between Mincha and maariv on Shabbos as during that time the souls that got a reprieve from Gehinom begin returning there (via water sources) and thus we shouldnt even eat the third meal then as if we eat we will come to drink as well.
However he writes that L'Chatchilah our custom is to indeed daven Mincha first and then eat the Seudah shlishis and not worry about drinking water at home and only be concerned with drinking water directly from a stream.
He further states that some have the custom that only when in the 12 month mourning period of a parent do they avoid drinking water at that time.
Finaly, he writes that some are of the opinion that this prohibition on Erev Shabbos, and not at the time of seudah Shlishis. (this is the also the ruling of the Shulchan Aruch Harav)
Many people do in fact drink water during Seudah Shlishis, but stop drinking once sunset arrives (See Biur Halacha ibid.)
CHIZUK CORNER
This section is dedicated L'Ilui Nishmas the late Telzer Rosh Yeshiva , HaRav Chaim Yaakov ben Rav Binyomin Moshe Stein Zatzal.
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זכר צדיק וקדוש לברכה
The Law of the Garbage Truck™
Copyright 2004 - 2009 David J. Pollay
How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? However, the mark of your success is how quickly you can refocus on what's important in your life.
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. And I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.
I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed, and at the very last moment our car stopped just one inch from the other car's back-end.
I couldn't believe it. But then I couldn't believe what happened next. The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face. And he even threw in a finger gesture! I couldn't believe it!
But then here's what really blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that!? This guy could have killed us!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck." He said:
"Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they look for a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you.
So when someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Believe me. You'll be happier."
So I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the street? It was then that I said, "I don't want their garbage and I'm not going to spread it anymore."
Important Numbers
