Q. My husband told me that he bought a Kever (burial plot) for me. Should I be worried?
Is it a bad siman or omen to buy a Kever when one is alive?
A. Talmud Berachos (19a) teaches that a person should be careful in his recitation of Vidui or confession of sins, and not mention that he deserves a great punishment, since: 'One must never open his mouth to the Satan, i.e., one must not leave room for or raise the possibility of disaster or evil.'
Responsa Min Hashamaim (22), quotes the above as the source why dreams should be always interpreted for the good, as the angels of judgment in charge may take the words said and fulfill them.
Chayei Odom (H. Shabbos 7: 24) mentions that a reason for the ones who's parents are alive to exit the shul when Izkor is recited, is to avoid a mistake of one accidentally reciting the words of Izkor for them.
Chassam Soffer (T. Y.D. 326), maintains a similar reason for not preparing, the needs for one's burial, while one is alive and well. He mentions that Avraham Avinu did not acquire the Meoras Hamchpela while Sarah was alive.
Sdei Chemed (Asifas Dinim, Avelus 82) mentions the above as the reason for the minhag of some not to completely pay for a kever, while one is still alive. However, he totally rejects the idea and quotes Shaagas Aryeh that it is an incorrect tradition.
Similarly, many Poskim permit and recommend acquiring a Kever and preparing Tachrichim (burial garments) in advance.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is similar.
Rabbi A, Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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