Q. Dear Rabbi. My also very dear daughter that has just had her twelfth birthday wants to light Chanuka candles together with all her older brothers. is that correct and advisable? In my wife's and my family ladies never lit a Menorah.
A. Regarding women's obligation on lighting Chanuka candles, on question 1542 we wrote:
" Shulchan Aruch (O.H. 675: 3) rules that women are obliged on the mitzva of Ner Chanuka, since they were also included in the miracle of its deliverance.
Although, Rema (671: 2) writes that the minhag is that all members of the household light their own menorah, Mishna Berura (ibid. 9), excludes women since Ishto Kegufo, she constitutes a single entity with her husband. Chasam Sofer (Shabbos 21b) adds that since the mitzva on the onset was to light by the door to the street, our sages instituted that out of a sense of modesty, it was proper the husband should light.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a and other Poskim's opinion is that when there is no husband, she has to light for herself in her own home, and not by a neighbor. She may however, if she does not desire to make her own brocho, ask a neighbor to recite the brocho in her home. (Being careful to avoid Yichud issues - See Kerem Shlomo 31)."
We may add to the above that following Rabenu Nissim story (Shabbos 23a), the salvation of Chanuka from the enemies was greatly due to the heroism of Yehudis Bas Yochanan Cohen Gadol.
Mishna Berura (ibid.) does mention that if a woman desires to light, she may do so even with a brocho.
She should then have intention not to comply with the mitzva of her father, who lights before she does.
(The tradition of Sephardi Kehilos differs - See Miya'am Halacha 1: 102)
In this particular case Horav Aharon Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that the daughter may light a Menorah is she so desires.
However, Horav Dovid Pam Shlit'a maintains that it is better to preserve the established family traditions.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a
Important Numbers
