Q. Dear Rabino. I have a shaila from your old country. A fellow member from the sinagoga that I take care of, is a recent good Baal Teshuva. He is married to a lady that converted and they have three young children. The problem is that he is a Cohen, so he is not allowed to be married to a giyoreth (converse woman).
If I tell him that he has to divorce her, he certainly will not keep anymore anything, and will just leave our congregation. He understands well the issue, but he just can’t divorce the mother of his three small children.
He also wants to know if during the Viduy (confession) he can say to Hashem with honesty; ‘I ask you forgiveness for the ‘cheth’ (sin) I’m still committing’? Should one confess to a sin he is unable to abandon?
A. There may be a number of uncertainties and doubts if he is actually committing a sin. Firstly many of the people converting in my native country are likely to have some Jewish origins as a significant group of ‘Marranos” or hidden Jews settled in Mexico when running from the inquisition, so at least there may be some actual doubt in regards to her being a convert (see question 4171). Besides, since he is also a Baal Teshuva and son of a family that did not keep mitzvot, he may not be a Cohen at all. It is not unusual that some individuals maintain erroneously that they are Cohanim, simply by the lack of knowledge of what is considered in Halacha a true Cohen and not just a name or similar.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that one should indeed recite viduy in such a case, as he quoted from the Yad Haktanah.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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